Thursday, January 7, 2010

Here's one vote for full body scans

"Today I’m flying for the first time since before Thanksgiving . . . and for the first time since the Panty Bomber tried to light his balls—and then the plane—on fire. And I have one very simple question: Who in their right mind would object to full-body scanners in the airport? I mean, who could be that God-damned dumb?"

This is how Steve Crescenzo begins a missive in Corporate Hallucinations. It is hilarious, very pointed, and in many ways I agree with what he is saying, although I would definitely phrase it differently. Please read the entire article below, I am sure you will enjoy it...

"There are people trying to blow our planes out of the sky. There are people strapping explosives to their genitals. The current security system obviously doesn’t work. Something needs to happen. And yet the ACLU and other morons object to having people go through full body scanners because of “privacy” reasons.

Utah Republican Jason Chaffetz, sponsor of a House bill banning the full-time use of body scanners, told the New York Times that he didn’t think that “anyone needs to see my 8 year old naked in order to secure that airplane.”
What an ass. The ACLU calls these body scanners “an assault on the essential dignity of passengers.” What a bunch of asses. We have terrorists trying to blow us out of the sky and people are worried about modesty? It defies logic.

As a nervous flyer to begin with, I certainly don’t care if they send me through a body scanner. Send me through TWO body scanners if you want to. Send me through a row of body scanners.
Pat me down. Pat me down again. Lay me flat on a conveyer belt with hundreds of other travelers and send us all through an MIR machine if that will keep the bombs off the planes.

Hell, you can drop a drug-sniffing rat into my pants . . . as long as you’re doing the same thing to everyone else, and doing it twice to the people most likely to try and blow up the plane (yes, Corporate Hallucinations fully supports all racial profiling, when it comes to airports).

Now, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking:

“That’s easy for you to say, Crescenzo. You’re Italian, blessed with an Italian’s anatomy. Who cares if someone scans your entire body and sees the Bald Eagle? You’ve got nothing to be ashamed of. “

And you’re also thinking:

“What about all the poor Irish and Japanese people out there, who weren’t so anatomically blessed? What about exposing those folks to the ridicule of heartless TSA workers who run the body scans?"



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I am a law enforcement professional with over 35 years experience in both sworn and civilian positions. I have service in 3 different countries in both the northern and southern hemispheres.

My principal areas of expertise are: (1) Intelligence, (2) Training and Development, (3) Knowledge Management, and (4) Administration/Supervision.

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